The worst week

This past week has been particularly hard.  A lot has been going on in my life, my family and my health.  A week ago Saturday my daughter heard from my son.  She's the one who said, "he'll eventually need us, and he'll call".  What she didn't know is she would be the one he'd call.  I think the experience she dealt with that day left her with an idea of how hard it can be to really want to help your family out, but you just can't.  

I could never tell you enough to help you understand how we all ( family ) got here to this point that we have limits and boundaries of what we can do to help him.  His car was broke down in town and he knew it was bad.  I know he had no where else to turn if he was calling on her.  I was sitting with my husband enjoying a cup of coffee on this quite but erie day.  I woke up with a strange feeling that I would hear from him this day.  I'd stop texting....even the prayers.  Anger and risen again and the little devil on my shoulder told me to stop wasting my time.  I didn't even know if he was reading them.  Obviously he had nothing to say to me.  My therapist said there was nothing wrong with me just leaving him alone and let him work it out.  Maybe that's why you don't hear from him she told me.  Maybe he just wants to be left alone.  

He asked my daughter to come and get him please.  She called me on the way and filled me in.   She was struggling with the idea of having to tell him she could not bring him home with her.  She had some options for him but staying with her, her husband and son was not one of them.  She was upset to deliver this news to her homeless brother.  I told her how much I understand and it made me so sad and relieved at once.  Sad for her because I'd been in this spot many times before and relieved he didn't call me.   Once she made it to him and went over his options they took care of a couple of things and she brought him to Hammond where my mom meet her and he went home with her.  He stayed that night with my brother and his family then two nights at my moms.  I had his car towed to our mechanic who informed me on Monday it was bad news.  Timing chain or possibly even the engine.  Neither of which did he do at his shop.  To many hours and not enough man power.  So it had to be towed again to a place he recommended.  As of today no word on it.  They told me it could take up to two weeks before they even started on it.  He is now at his dad's place in Bogalusa, LA.  He'll be there until his car is fixed and then he says he's coming back here.  We've all tried convincing him to stay there where he has help, get a job and get back on your feet then come back to Baton Rouge when you can afford a place to stay.  When you can support yourself and your daughter.

The same day we heard from him I had started feeling pretty bad with some allergy/sinus stuff.  By Tuesday I'd given in to seeing the doctor.  The rest of the week I still felt fatigued mentally and physically.  It wasn't until over this past weekend did I start to feel a little better.
I was thinking I was going to have to go back.  

My granddaughter came on Saturday.  We stopped off at the library and checked out some books.  It was a very cold day and we were happy to stay inside.  Nice and warm, both of us fighting a cough and allergies.  On Saturday evening my daughter came with P to visit his cousin and her and I just get to chill and catch up.  We had a nice visit.  It was the best part of my entire week.  The only good part!

With everything going on with my son, the cold and some other family problems my back seemed to feel the stress of it all too!  Not to mention the several long car rides I took during during the week.  The first day I used the patch I mentioned in last post really seemed to help my back for up to 2-3 hours.  Supposed to be  up to 12.  But hey I'm excited about what i get. No luck for helping my battery, I think there is only one solution for that and I'll delay as long as I can.  The good news about them is I found out my insurance covers it.  Thank goodness.  Shelf price $300 for a box of 30.  Outrageous huh?  My copay will be $50 but with all the others it starts to add up.  

I haven't called and asked for a prescription just yet.  I went and bragged about being hive free for 3 months.  Had them for 3 years, off 3 months and WHAM here they are again!  I'm wondering if it could possible be the patches.  I doubt it, but I'm having trouble excepting they are back to stay.  I've laid off the patches a few days to see if they go away.  Ugh, it was so nice for them to be gone, they are so annoying.  

So here's to a new and better week.  Seriously it can't be worse than last week even though it didn't start so hot this Monday.  A phone call from my brother regarding my mother has the anxiety level right back up there.  I'm going to get through this week and take what comes over the week end as we are supposed to get together to work with my mom to resolve some issues.  I wish I could just run away and hide and relax this week end.  I'm sure we all do at times in our life.  Nice thought, but when the going gets tough, the tough try harder. What I striving for.  

Happy Birthday Karen.  I hope your day was especially nice.  

Thank you to all my friends checking in on me and being so understanding for so long.  I'm not my old self, but trying very hard to get back there.  The end of April my husband and I are getting out of Dodge and heading to the beach for a long week end.  I can't wait.  I need it NOW!

never a dull moment!

primping :-)

refusing to smile...little stink <3

Theresa


  A gift to a child is the gift of a parent's listening ear- and heart.

It's over with...

At the risk of sounding like all I do is complain....I'm going to update you all on my visit with my MP doctor ( he did the SCS implant).  I hadn't seen him since the last post surgery check after implant.  I did have an appointment a few months (Oct) back but he ended up just speaking with me at the surgical center where they did the x ray to see if my leads had moved.  I saw him Friday which  had been scheduled for 6 weeks.  I put it off as long as I could hoping that something would change and I would go in praising him for changing my life.
On the video they give you to view from St. Jude to watch when considering a stimulator all the testimonies say just that.  Having the Spinal Cord Stimulator has changed my life.  Some cases were much worse than mine.  An injured solider, a person in a horrible car accident and many more.  Maybe that's why my expectations were so high.  

I gave him the good news first.  I told him at my last meeting with Mr. R we'd finally made a little progress.  It's so close I told him.  I'm optimistic that as I approach a year (May) it will be even better.  Possibly the unwanted areas going away.  Then the bad...trouble with my battery.  I explained how uncomfortable it has been.  Well uncomfortable is not quite it....painful.  "Please tell me some people take this long to rid of the soreness"?  He said, no I should be fine in that area.  I explained the burning sensations and how I feel it's moved.  Kind of twisted like.  One corner in upper right is protruding out.  
He was puzzled about the heated feeling especially that it happens when stimulator is not even on.  Then he took a look at surgery area.  Oh yeah, he agreed.  I don't remember the exact word he used but definitely confirmed its shifted out of the "pocket".  My theory is that if I would have had the battery I chose implanted I'd be fine right now.

He said he was going to consult with St. Jude about the heating sensation.  I told him I have been in touch with Mr. R about having trouble charging.  He fixed it last time we met but when I went to charge again I had same trouble.  This week I received a package from St. Jude and it was a new charger.  I guess Mr. R took care of that.  After seeing the doc I'm now thinking my charger was fine and my battery shifting has something to do with it.  It probably isn't "making connection".  The wand has to lay flat over the battery when charging.  That is kind of hard to do now that it's moved.  I plan on consulting with Mr. R on this theory tomorrow.  Guess I'll know for sure after trying to charge with new charger.   

I didn't get a clear answer of what we will do if my battery continues to be a problem.  I guess he wanted to talk to St. Jude first.  The nurse told me she has seen this before and they just had to reposition.  OK, there is only one way to get to it.  YUCK.....I don't want to go through that again.  For temporary relief he gave me some samples of Lidoderm patches. (Lidocaine patch 5%)
I put to the test yesterday and today.  It really doesn't help my battery area but I noticed a big difference for 2-3 hours on my back.  He said if they worked he'd write me a script for them.  Of course I looked on my Rx plan and their not covered. I'll check with my pharmacist tomorrow to see what they will cost out of pocket.  I'm just glad the appointment is over, the least favorite office I have to go to. 

So my pinterest idea for this week end was "ice cream for breakfast".  I ate as a snack not for breakfast but you could.  It's just frozen banana's, good for you!  2 ingredient treat.  Freeze 4 sliced banana's and when completely frozen
pulse in food processor.  It will look like gravel at first but just keep pulsing and it will eventually get smooth, creamy and light like you see here.  You can find original recipe on the bloggers address if you follow me on pinterest under "things I've tried" or "something healthy"

you'll need to stop and scrape sides a lot

Next step....here is your 2nd ingredient.  2-3 tablespoons of peanut butter, almond butter, whatever your preference.  (next time I'm going to try Nutella, there goes healthy!)  Continue to pulse until well combined.  She also recommended coco powder and peanut butter together.  I stuck just with the coco since I do not care for peanut butter.  It taste good plain with just the banana's but not every one cares for banana flavor.  For breakfast, I'm good with it.

with the coco added

Tried a little taste, yummy.  Especially for a healthy treat what ever the time you want it.  You can eat right away or freeze for later.  She recommends if you put in freezer to let it sit out a while before trying to serve.

a close up in the bowl

I read some comments following the post and a lot of readers tried strawberries added or chocolate chips.  I think I'll stick to the healthy stuff.  Most importantly make sure the bananas are completely frozen.  She said an hour, but it took 2 in my freezer.  I tried to soon and believe me it doesn't work.  Also the banana's need to be ripe but not black.  Just starting to have brown spots on them.  

So long friends.  This has been a rough week I'm praying for a better one this one.  We're having some bad weather here and from the sound coming from the kennel I'm not sure Dallas will not let me sleep.

God is Good....Always,
Theresa

Rock & Worship

Last night at the RiverCenter in Baton Rouge, LA. a friend and I went to The Rock & Worship Roadshow.  We definitely did some rocking and some worshiping.  It was fantastic!  Not to mention the fabulous artists that were there and it was moving to see such a diversity of people.  Elementary age, adolescences, families with their children and yes grandparents.  There were some acts that we enjoyed more than others but the "enjoy" outweighed the "others".

It cost $10 a person to get in.  Most artists were selling their cd's for $5 or $10.  Even new releases.   Your probably asking yourself why only $10.  They want you to be able to come if you have $10 in your pocket or $100.  No one left out.  If parents want to bring their whole family it wouldn't break the bank and they could even afford to purchase some music too.  I know they can't possibly make any money at $10 a ticket but that is not their purpose.  They know God will provide and help them to continue to let everyone that wants to come and see their favorites preform live.  A documentary that features behind the scenes of "The Rock & Worship Roadshow its being filmed now.  It tells the story of what it takes to put the show together and their challenges.  Lights, audio, weather,  life on a bus and putting on an amazing show.  Roadshow-The Film.  Check it out @ Roadshowfilm.com 

I've been to see this tour before, so I knew how great it would be both spiritually and entertaining.  Both times I was able to see some of my favorite Christian artists.  No different from a regular concert...loud music, people singing, even dancing.
Amazing lights, smoke, videos playing in the back ground and even some rapping.  My friend and I weren't quite sure what they were saying but we did hear "Believer" and "God" in there somewhere so it passed as Christian.  If the good lord is willing, it will be back next year and so will I!

I love the bags of mini bell peppers.  They are great for a snack and I love them in salads because they are so easy to cut up.  I actually like to just slice them just like a cucumber in little circles for my salad.  Easy to pick up with your fork!

The problem is I usually end up with waste because I never eat them all before they go bad.  I decided to not let that happen this time.  I have a couple of things to experiment with.  Tonight I tried "Mini stuffed peppers"  They were stuffed with a mixture of several things combined and topped with panco, olive oil and parmesan.  Every thing is good topped with Parmesan....yum.

stuffed

with topping

baked

These little peppers were so tasty I had to stop myself from eating them all in one sitting. They would be perfect as an appetizer when grilling or hosting a shower or party of some type.  I used fat free cream cheese and fat free cheddar to help reduce the calories.  I actually mixed half ff cheddar and my WW 3 cheese mix.  The actual recipe called for goat cheese.  You can use what ever you have on hand or like, or double the cream cheese and I think it will still taste great.  Next I want to make a meat stuffing to try.

Somehow I don't think that will be as quick and easy. 

Over the week end I had some strawberries to finish off so I went searching for something low fat to do with them.  Found a low fat strawberry muffin recipe.  (Forgot to take a picture) They didn't taste low fat at all to me.  Of course I changed a thing or two.  I didn't have the unsweetened applesauce so I used 2 very ripe bananas.  I also added a little almond milk for flavor.  Another time I had to control myself.  Somehow when you know it's low fat you convince your self to have 2 instead of 1.  Maybe even 3???

Have a great week and I'll be back to chat soon.

Fighting back, Theresa

    The things you take for granted someone else is praying for.