Hi... My name is Alicia I had my stimulator put in 8 weeks ago. I dont know how to feel!! It is not helping in my upper back. It helps to get rid of some of the pain in lumbar and lower back. What really gets me is not being able to do simple stuff.... when I do little stuff around house;Im quickly reminded by my body sit down. Im in pain all the time.... now Im second guessing my decsion to get stimulator..... please email any suggestions..
Alicia
Those little things around the house have to be broken down for me. I am stubborn and for a long time continued to just knock it out and get it over with. After that the next day I was useless. Now I try do at least one thing a day. By the time I'm done I need to start over but at least it gets done. My husband has heard so many times I was going to......blah blah blah but by the time I finished Wal Mart and another errand I had to come home. When I was working I know it really got old for him to come home every day and find me in the bed. I always felt like he just couldn't know what I was going through. Am I sounding familiar?
I replied to Alicia's comment and told her I'd communicate with her via email so I wouldn't just be repeating myself for all my readers or have a comment a page long. I gave her an email address to contact me and little did I know I heard right back from her. While reading her email the tears began to flow. For the first time in the last month I felt a flutter of hope and relief that I'm not crazy. That others are assuring me they are dealing with some of the same struggles I have. We're not determining who has it worse just that we're there for each other and no matter the level or time of pain you're in, ITS REAL and YOUR LIVING with it. Here is what she said to me.....
Hi, Theresa!
Thank you for responding. I have been following your blog since August 30th when I had my surgery. It has been 8 long weeks! I was on my morning walk last november, and I was hit by a car while walking across the street. Since then I have had neck fusion surgery to repair the c4-c5 disks that were rubbing in my neck. This left me with a metal plate and four screws. I have disks that are also rubbing in my lumbar... I did spinal decompression, therapy nothing helped. I'm allergic to the steroids, they caused me to bleed internally... To keep from having surgery on my back I decided to have the stimulator put in. When I first got it I found that it worked pretty good to help me out with my daily pain. I felt a little relief in the lumbar and legs... Im noticing now that the pain Im having in my upper back is horrible... The stimulator does nothing for this area... When I told the Doc, about this he said it may not be able to reach this area, due to the spinal fliud in that area being thick. I'm trying to give the stimulator a chance... But I can't even sit at the kitchen table for long periods of time, because of the pain in my upper back. Im a freelance graphic designer and can no longer work... What gets me is not being able to do the stuff I love to do. I'm really depressed... I see a therapist every week. My life has changed so much in the last few months. I't seems like no one understands!!! I have gotten to the point where I dont want to explain anymore, I do ALOT of journaling!!! When you tell people your in pain on a daily basis,they don't know what to say to you. I have a appointment on Monday to see my Doctor and the St. jude rep. I hope that she can do some fine tuning (as you put it ; ) and make me feel a lil better. I have a torn rotator cuff that , I will be having surgery on in December. I thought that getting the stimulator would help me move forward, but it feels like I'm going back. Your blog has helped me alot. It helps to know that someone else is going through the samething......
I'm sure if you've been following my blog for long a lot of her words sound familiar. When she said " I've gotten to the point where I don't want to explain anymore" It it home for me. One of the biggest reasons I've become a hermit and stay home any chance I get. This doesn't sit well with my therapist, she wants me out spending time with friends and talking about other things. She always says, your friends will understand that some subjects I just don't want to talk about. I'm ok with that, but it's obvious I can't do some of the things they can and I just feel like a party pooper.
My heart goes out to Alicia. Her life was great one day and completely changed the next. What a long hard journey to recover and she's not finished yet. Kind of odd that she is getting coverage where I'm yearning to have it. Doesn't seem fair that you go through this kind of procedure and it doesn't work. I feel the same as her. Relief in the beginning and then wham out of no where I totally lost what coverage I had. Then dealing with all these nerves being effected that don't need to be that actually cause pain for me. It was so much better earlier on which doesn't make sense. Not even to the doctors. I'm still hoping in a little more time maybe Mr. R or Lovely will be able to get it the right place for me. If not, I have some big decisions to make.
She has a grandson she longs to be able to care for and spend precious time with. That went straight to the heart for me. Something else we feel the same about and both said is if we feel this way now, what will it be like 10 years from now. I've said so many times that when I first get up in the morning I feel like a 47 year old trapped in a 90 year old body. It's slow moving and wait for the drugs to kick in.
Donna; thanks for the nice comment. It's readers like you and Alicia that lift my spirits. I never like hearing someone else is dealing with this type of pain but knowing that you understand helps you cope a little better. Please fill me in on how you are doing. One thing you can count on is if you reach out to me, I'll be here. I've contacted two SCS patients with a blog and the never answered. One I tried again because our cases seemed so similar I thought she could give me some answers. She recovered and her life completely changed. She went back to doing things she used to do. So well that her blog isn't anything about SCS's its all about her career.
Leaving you with a picture of an aloe vera plant I'v had since 2010. It was started from my friend Betty's plant and has grown and been shared with some of my friends. Odd thing it has this add bloom (?) in the middle that I've never seen before. My husband things it may be one of those types of plants that bloom every 5 years or so. Who knows but it's unusual.
Our pool is officially closed. D put the cover on this week. A sad day, I'm already wishing May was here. It looked so pretty outside today. Sun was shining and Dallas wanted to just lay on the deck and sun bathe. Didn't feel like winter coming at all. If I had my way I'd sure keep it away. Makes my condition so much more intense. Have a safe and fun week end. Here in Baton Rouge we are bombarded with Bama fans for the big game tomorrow night.
Fighting back.....Theresa
The things you take for granted someone else is praying for.
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