Barely made it out to the beach today. I'm starting to wear down. My body just isn't used to and can't take so much activity so many days in a row. It's alright once we're out here but it's getting to were my poor husband has to carry everything. Today I waited at the bath house and picnic area while he went down and set everything up and then he came back for me and the rest of the stuff. It could also be effects of missing my medicine since Saturday also. As of 11:00 haven't heard from doctors office.
Supposed to rain this afternoon so I may get to just chill around the room.
My surgery was on a Friday and Saturday they had me up and walking. I kept feeling like nothing was different but who knew what to expect? Never had back surgery before. My husband stayed with me Friday night and my daughter came to stay on Saturday night. Sunday I went home. The first few weeks went ok then I started really hurting. I knew something was wrong because you should get a little better each day not progress to worse. At my two week check I told him that something was not feeling right, it was feeling worse than before surgery. He took an x-ray to make sure nothing had moved, no loose screws. Everything looked great. 10% he said have this problem. Some inflammation around surgery site. Started me on Celebrex and said it would get better. I was also taking Percocet for pain and I complained to him it was keeping me awake so he prescribed me Ambien. So I decided that because I wasn't sleeping maybe that was why I wasn't feeling better. So three meds now, zero before two weeks after.
From the start I did everything they told me. Wore my brace faithfully. Only when I was in bed could I take off. Made sure I did the roll log they taught at hospital to get up and I had two of those grabber things to make sure I didn't do any bending. They told me to gradually start walking a little more each day so that first week I went as far as I could go with my husband around the block while he was walking the dog. By week two I could get all the way around without starting to hurt to bad. So the Celebrex did its job apparently then at 4 weeks I went back to work.
The first week I did all half days. I lives less than 2 miles from work so doc was ok with that. But a month later D and I were at his office. I was hurting so bad that I wanted to go to emergency room that Sunday. They had called something different in but it didn't touch the pain. It was worse than before surgery, worse than when I woke up from surgery. He sent me for a MRI and that was pure torture. Laying still that 25 minutes in the pain I was in on my back and of course it had to be with contrast so when I thought we were done they were just pulling me out to inject some dye. OMG I didn't think I was gonna live through it. Why can't you help me reduce this pain?
This went on until my 6 month mark and it started to be controlled. Didn't go away and I was constantly talking to people about it. Oh, you've been through a major surgery, it takes your body time to recover from that. Nope, not going for it. I had talked to my daughters sister in laws mom. She had a double fusion, didn't wear her brace and woke up from surgery feeling awesome. Went back to work on time and ZERO complications after. There were others I talked to also. So even though I was doing things I used to do, I was not doing them with out being uncomfortable. Most people thought I was just moving right along as normal. I went back to the gym to do just what they said but I did it in pain. At 9 months I could only walk on tread mill, sit in steam room and when I got on the mat to stretch I was lucky if I got up :-(.
On August 13, 2009 my first grandchild was born. Sweet baby girl. She was born about an hour away so when I got the call I left work and started the drive and I remember when I got there I felt like I'd been driving for 12 hours. I could hardly stand straight. It was only 2 months so I didn't worry to much then.
On October 26, 2009 the second one arrived. Handsome baby boy! I saw him come into this world. I will never again experience anything like that. My daughter went to the hospital at 3 or 4 in the morning and he wasn't here to around 8 that night. (sorry B if I have the times wrong, I still remember both you and your brother so forgive my brain it's full) Not to mention I was just sick to my stomach that at such an amazing time in my life I was dealing with such misery. I remember leaving the hospital feeling like I was going to die from being on my feet for so long. I felt so bad emotionally too because my daughter just delivered her first child and I'm complaining about my back.
Back on time line in May of 2010 we planned a trip to Destin with my daughter and her husband and of course baby P. Big beautiful eyes, couldn't wait to see him at the beach. 2 weeks before we left I had a flare up and it was like I was back to square one. It felt like I just had surgery all over again.
Its a long story how I ended up at another orthopedic doctor but bottom line is I felt like they didn't give a crap about me. Like I was making it all up. They were to busy to see me, go to the emergency room.
What? Your kidding me. You have to make this right, I don't want to live like this. I want to enjoy my babies. They can do more than me soon.
I remember the date well because I was so thankful they got me in. It was a Monday and we were leaving the following Friday. I was so happy that his poor staff was working on Memorial Day. Couldn't believe I got in. Maybe, just maybe this doctor will end it all for me. He talked to me for a while. Checked me out and said I was super stiff and needed some physical therapy but he did want a MRI to make sure there were no hardware problems and that there was a complete fusion. So I came back in two days, did a CAT scan and MRI and saw him on Friday again. Everything looks fine, he said. You know, you have bad discs, your muscles are so tight and you still have some inflammation. He said the stiffness will go away with some physical therapy but I think you will just have to live with your back like it is. You've had surgery, sometime that changes things. He also said why keep taking the Celebrex if not working. I like Meloxicam. Lets switch to that and come back and see me when your done with physical therapy. Oh yeah, and walk, walk and walk to you can't walk anymore. I want at least two miles a day from you. Everyday. And he meant it. It may not get you "perfect" but it will get you to feeling better. I cried all the way back to my house. SOmehow, I knew he was right that I was going to be living with this terrible pain.
I started the physical therapy on Monday and managed to get three secessions in before we left town. My family will tell you. Through everything, anything a doctor asked me to do, I did it. I was the ideal patient. I followed every instruction they gave me. Even when we were in Destin, I did the darn stretches and walked two miles. My husband and my daughter took turns walking with me. I'm so lucky that my family has stood by me and tried to understand how I was feeling. Notice I said tried. You'll never know how it feels unless you experience it. I'm sure there are plenty people dealing with pain I've never experienced. I did the 6 week and then continued to keep doing it on my own at home after.
Folks, I'm getting tired. Its been a long day. We had Olive Garden for dinner. Oh my it was so good. Brought some left overs home. I miss my bed terribly. Tomorrow my husband wants to do something I hate with a passion. Go shopping. I know, most women love it. Not if you have a bad back you don't. Its nice, I'm outside by the pool typing this. Wondering how my doggie is doing. I'm going to call and check on him tomorrow. And of course, I miss my babies. That will be the high light of going home. A comes for a visit. She lives out of town and I will see P on Mothers day. My mom is coming to stay a couple days with me after surgery so I probably won't see her until then. (She lives hour and half away.)
I hear the fish jumping in the bay. Oh yeah, no luck getting anything with my anxiety medicine today. Maybe tomorrow. They talked to me to late to authorize form prescribing doctor.
A good night to all and if your hurting I'm so sorry. I'm praying for us all.
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