Rainy Wednesday

Today did not go as planned at all.  Awake most of the night hurting in the strangest

places.  Should have known rain was coming I just didn't think of that.  When I quit

fighting and got up to start the day I just couldn't do it.  It hurt to even walk on my feet.

Turned out it was a good day to cancel plans and stay home.  Dallas boy (dog) is quite

fearful of the bad weather.  We recently had to start sedating him when its a bad thunderstorm.

Let me clarify, it is a sedating tablet, but he's like his mommy, hard to put down.  It does

help calm him down.  He has kept prince charming and I away for 3-4 hours in the middle of the night before.

Another reason was today was the 1 year anniversary of my dads death.  Doesn't seem like it has been a year.  Wow, it has.  With the weather, my pain and my crazy manic dog I felt like it was a perfect mourning day.  Not a day to be out and about and like I said, my body was just not working with me.  I hope I feel better tomorrow because pain or not I have to go out to take care of some business and then come home and pack to leave Friday am.

Last night I wrote about 2005 and what was going on.  In 2006 I saw a different chiropractor (a friend of my husbands) to give that one more try.  The only time it wasn't really nagging me by then was when I was in the pool.  I guess because you are weightless I wouldn't feel that nagging weight, pressure and burning feeling that was hanging around even more and more.

I never really said to to many people at this point how bad it was but I was starting to realize that there were no more "good days"  

I had a cleaning job I did for extra money when I was single on the week ends.  It usually took me 2-3 hours.  I kept it after we were married because I enjoyed the "mad" money but by this time what was happening when I got home on Sunday I had to lay down for mostly the rest of the day.  I couldn't even clean my own house.  I was also cleaning the office at work on Friday mornings since we were closed on Fridays.  I hung on to that another 6 months or so but then I had to give it up also.  Same thing happened.  I'd be hurting so much that I couldn't do any personal errands or shopping I had to go home and use heat or ice to jump start my back again.

Then I broke down and did what people had been tell me to do.  Go see an orthopedic. I decided that 5-6 years was enough trying other things.  I made an appointment, which I would wait 3-4 weeks for.  I remember being hopeful that finally someone would tell me why my back hurt so bad.  I knew my husband was getting tired of hearing me say. "my back hurts".  I saw him, a lot of history taken then all he said was I need an MRI to see whats going on.  Lets get that done then I'll see you after that.  Ok, more waiting....two weeks later MRI appointment after for him to review.  I had a bad disc at L4/L5 that was bulging, but not bad he said.  Shouldn't be hurting you as much as you say.  So he recommended that I see a rheumatologist to rule out any autoimmune disease.  Obviously, he didn't find anything but I really liked him a lot. First doctor I saw that seemed to really care that I was dealing with pain on a day to day basis.  Every appointment he asked me to make I did and every blood work up he asked for I did.  I'm still seeing him today. (the rheumatologist, not the orthopedic)


During the time I was seeing him I was also still doing the acupuncture, no chiropractor and stretching.  Stretching every morning before work.  I had done a lot of research on line about how to heal your own back and stretching kept coming up.  I will say it kept me going for 2 years or so.  It didn't completely make the pain go away but a lot more manageable.  Cut back on the ibuprofen.  After my stretches my back would feel good for several hours so I was grateful for that. So....if you aren't  bored enough yet I'll fill you in tomorrow on what happened next. 

We miss you dad :-/